Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...

Why is it that my love life has gone from:

I am thinking it's a sign
that the freckles in our eyes
are mirror images
and when we kiss they're perfectly aligned

(Postal Service, Give Up, Such Great Heights)

to this:

You seem so out of context
in this gaudy apartment complex
A stranger with your door key
explaining that I am just visiting
And I am finally seeing
Why I was the one worth leaving

(Same, Same, The District Sleeps Alone Tonight)

Intellectually, I know that she needs space because I've done some crappy, crappy things to her (e.g., closing myself off to the world for a weekend when her mom was in town or freaking out [SUPERDRUNK] and scaring the bejeezus out of her with my explosion of emotion [yes, explosion: I think I might have broken one of the metacarpals in my hand] and those are just a couple of instances of some of the badness of the last couple of months).
Emotionally, it feels like she's already gone. No more "I love you" when we hang up the phone. No more kiss hello. No more expression of affection as any more than a friend, and sometimes less than that.
The worst part about it is, I feel better than I have in months. I'm upbeat and cheerful. I'm actually enjoying my life for the first time in what seems like forever. And instead of being able to share it with her, it feels like she's getting ready for the, "Let's just be friends" speech.
Maybe I'm reading things the wrong way. Maybe she really just needs a little bit of time to make sure that I'm actually flying on an even keel instead of rollercoastering through the highs and lows (let's face it, mostly lows) of the crazy shit in my brain.
But I gotta tell ya, I haven't been wrong yet. I hope I am this time.
All of this means more talking, and I'm not too good at that. I'm finding that she isn't too good at it either. While she definitely doesn't hide her emotions, coming flat out verbally with what's bothering her is fairly difficult. Getting her to tell me what's going on is just as hard as I'm sure it is to get me to talk about the same things.
Damn.